What Narcissists Do When a Relationship Ends

What Narcissists Do When a Relationship Ends

Relationships with Narcissists are messy. If you go in clean, you will come out dirty. As they always make sure they tarnish your reputation, contaminate your spirit, and ruin your looks and mental health. It is rare for someone to get out of such a toxic relationship the same way as they went into it. And even when you get out of it, the Narcissist is still not finished with you.

So, today I want to talk about what Narcissists do when a relationship ends. These are things they do regardless of who discarded who. Because at the end of the day, the Narcissist is all about staying at the top of their game and that usually means at the expense of pushing someone down.

For More: 8 Phrases That Scream Narcissism.

What Narcissists Do When a Relationship Ends:

#1: Control the narrative.

One of the first things they do is try and control the narrative as to why the relationship ended. It is all about damage control so that they appear to be innocent victims at the end of it all. The Narcissist may go all out on a savage smear campaign to discredit the other person, or they may choose to play ignorant, having no clue as to why the relationship is over. This is still very damaging to the other person because it can make the other person seem ungrateful or even mentally unstable for deciding to leave the Narcissist. But the Narcissist knows exactly what outcome they are hoping to achieve, and in the end, it will always be to the detriment of the other person.

The only person’s reputation that matters is the Narcissist’s. So, they would have already been slandering the other person long before the relationship ended. Slander and gossip are like insurance for the Narcissist in preparation for if the relationship ends. The footwork had already started, and the flying monkeys were already lying in wait. Because the more people that side with the Narcissist, the more it will discredit the other person who tries to speak against the Narcissist.

Read More: 10 Lies All Narcissists Tell.

#2: The blame game.

The second thing on their agenda is ensuring that you receive the blame. Whatever narrative the Narcissist chooses, they will be the victim. The victim card is the only choice for the Narcissist when a relationship ends with them. It does not matter if they were the cause of all the trouble in the relationship; they will spin it and project, deflect, and blatantly lie to cover their asses. The blame game will be in full swing and even if they pretend to take responsibility for something, it will not compare to the burden of guilt that they lay on the other person.

Recommended Book: Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself- By Shahida Arabi.

But those are the two things that are guaranteed to happen irrespective of who ended the relationship. With regards to what they do when someone discards them, on top of what I have mentioned already is that they will basically seek revenge and that revenge can include trying to get the other person to take them back. But when you give a Narcissist another chance, they are looking to destroy you and then be the one to discard you. It is all about getting the upper hand.

End the Narcissist’s Control:

Relationships, like everything else, are a game to the Narcissist and they hate losing. They want control from start to finish. They want to decide when a relationship ends, how it ends, and what others should believe. Once they have that control, they consider themselves to be the winners. But you can take that control away from them when you decide how much access you want them to have, if any. You take control when you cut them off or out of your life. Narcissistic Relationships are really not worth the hassle. They are not worth your sanity or your peace of mind. And as I discussed, getting out is not usually the end as the Narcissist will still try to continue to bring you down however they can. But their lies and slander will allow you to find out who is really for you or against you.

Recommended: Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse.

You will find out who your true friends and family are. It can be a painful time. A lonely time, but it too shall pass, and you can start rebuilding. Because when a relationship ends with a Narcissist, it is a chance for you to start fresh and learn from that experience. It is a chance to separate from those who do not wish you well. But most importantly, it is a time for healing. That is a journey that is different for every person but healing from Narcissist abuse is possible and that is what I wish for everyone.

Okay, that is it from me for today. I hope you all found this useful. Please remember to share wherever you can, and also share your experiences in the comment section below. Have a blessed week and many thanks for reading.

Read More: 10 Weird Signs of Narcissistic Victim Syndrome.

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